Ironic Rambings

Fantastic Fantasies of a Fanciful New World

The question came up recently which set my mind thinking.  What to do with the French Jews facing more and more terrorist attacks, kidnappings, robberies, insults?  They really can’t stay much longer or feel safe anywhere in Europe any longer. 

From historical experience, they need to pack up and leave quickly, or perhaps wait until the coming elections to see who becomes the government.   But if they leave, it needs to be orderly, and also make a grand political gesture, that they are taking their wealth, their experience, their heritage with them.  It would have to be the young and busy people and their families, and not just the elderly and the retired.  They could leave France to stew in its own cauldron of Muslim fundamentalism.

But where would they go?  Not all of the Jews of France can move to Israel and into Netanya sur le mer and loll about the cafes and support the importers of fine cheese and wine.  It would be a shame to give up their French language and culture.  So maybe they should go where so many others have in the last five years, to la belle province of Quebec, and help develop Montreal as the Paris of North America. That then might in turn start to inspire non-Jewish intellectuals, artists and academics, who aren't swept away in the ride of left-wing post-structuralist and post-modernist suicidal political correctness, to go over to Canada as well.  Finally, a strong and free non-Americanized Canada; and the weather is warming up too, with more land becoming arable in Labrador, if only the Esquimaux could share in the wealth and progress, without losing even more of their heritage.

Most of Europe has sold out completely to the Islamic masses.  Other sane and secular people might also make the move and there would be a strong of cultured, democratic semi-autonomous statelets or non-Anglophone enclaves within 150-200 kilometres of the US border, filling in the gaps between the already existing Canadian cities. 

There would be no use going southwards to Trumpish/Sanderonian, Clintonic America, full of reactionary Tea-Party, xenophobic and anti-Darwinian dumbies, racdketeers, corrupt bankers and Wall Street blowhards. The good Americans could perhaps then actually do what they threaten to do if any of the above came to government, move to Canada.  They might squeeze on to Prince Edward Island, if there were enough.  Or if they really came in droves, Wagons north! perhaps a deal might be struck with Greenland to begin to settle and farm some of the unfreezing territory, provided the new immigrants were willing to learn Inuit languages or at least Danish.

Most of Latin America is still full of basket-case economies and drug-cartel crime.  Only Belize or a rented out Galapagos island or two seems a feasible option. Uruguay has taken too many extreme positions lately to be trusted. And the Falkland Islands have already had their fair share of international attention. 

New Zealand, or as it is better known today, Middle Earth and Xena the Warrior Princess’s stomping ground, or at least the balmy South Pacific?  If only the French hadn't given up on Akaroa and developed their colony, despite the British treaty with the Maori Tribes on the North Island.  I am not sure the French Jews could go in large numbers to Tahiti, New Caledonia or other small Polynesian or Melanesian islands, even though there was a brief period when the Queen of Tahiti was married to a Jew—and something interesting might have developed had he not been more interested in little commercial ventures.  Ditto for the German Jewish shopkeepers who went to Tonga, Samoa and German New Guinea.  When the would-be German colonists came to New Zealand, there probably were no Jews among them, but, even if there were, when the burgher families saw what they had thought would be a good place to settle from what they saw on the map back in Deutschland, and it turned out to be White Island, that is, a volcano and a pile of guano, they quickly turned around left, leaving at best a handful of Lutheran pastors to build a hut or two on some tiny islands between Stewart Island (then called the South Island) and the South Island (then called the Middle Island or New Munster).  That's why there are so few Lutherans here today.

An alliance between Monaco, Andorra and Lichtenstein might take a good lead in organizing these transformation of geopolitics, although if a superpower such as Malta, Luxembourg or Costa Rica (should we add East Timor?) would lend a hand, the process would run more smoothly.  St.-Pierre et Miquelon have always stood for a toehold of France in North America, and so perhaps, if we push aside the rum smugglers and illegal fishing boats, we might be able to use them as advance staging posts for the new armada of Jewish and other intellectual refugees.