The Old Curmudgeon Kvetches

MODERN BUSINESS

What do you mean they are always badgering you?

I mean they keep claiming that I didn’t pay my bill.

Did you?

Of course, as always, I wrote a cheque at once, put it in an envelope, and posted it as soon as I could get to the mail box.

So what’s the problem?

They say they never received the cheque.

Is that what they said?

No, they said they had not received payment. A friendly remindner.

Well, maybe the cheque didn’t come.

Maybe shmaybe, I addressed the envelope, smacked on a stamp, and dropped it into the mailbox.

Do you trust the postal service so much?

Not really, but what else should I do?

What do they want you to do?

They want me to get the bank to start mailing regular automatic payments.

That would solve your problem, wouldn’t it?

Not at all.

What do you mean?

I would be locked into automatic payments I could never get out of. 

Come on, get real: this is the twenty-first century.

I asked at the bank and they said it is best not to have automatic payments.  It’s a whole bother out of which you can lose a lot, and always be in debt.

Well, at least you don’t have to worry about monthly payments, as long as you want to stay with the company.

But maybe I would want to change.

Maybe you won’t.

I am only with these people because I had a whole shlamozzle with the last company.

What kind of a shlamozzle?

When I switched from one to the other, the first refused to stop the automatic withdrawals.

But you did stop them eventually, didn’t you?

Yes, but only after the bank had to go into battle for me.

So there you are: you did get out of it and the bank helped you.

Only after a shlamozzle.

So why are you unhappy now?

Because this is not the first time they have claimed I didn’t make a payment.

How did you solve the problem on those occasions?

I went into the bank and they straightened things out for me.

Isn’t that good?

No, it was a whole shlamozzle.  I had to go downtown to the bank.

Why didn’t you phone them up?

I like to see people and explain things face to face.

Is that what you did this time?

No.

No?

No, I went to the post office and made the payment there.

Isn’t that good?

Not really.

Why?

It was still a shlamozzle, though not so bad.

Why?

The post office is not so far away.

Still, the clerks and tellers are helpful, aren’t they?

Exactly my point.

What is your point?

I don’t like being accused of things I didn’t do.

So just make it a routine to go to the bank or the post office, and forget sending in the cheques.

I don’t like routine.

So vary the days you go, and sometimes go the post office and sometimes to the ban,.

Still, it’s all a shlamozzle.

What is a shlamozzle?

I won’t know until the next statement comes whether they received the money.

If they don’t bother you and badger you, won’t you be safe?

I don’t trust them.

Who?

Everybody.