Sayings for the end of July

The Philological Grouch Rides Again…

The point at which I stop reading and move on to the next thing:

When a person says she or he “researches” something.  Does that mean they “searched” for information on Google or Wikipedia, or they investigated a problem, or analysed a text, or thought long and hard about the topic?

When people talk about “issues” without indicating whether they are matters up for discussion, problems in their personal life, symptoms of an illness or points of contention.

When a critic writes that “art ought to be” this or that.

When I realize that the “beautiful daughter” they are mourning is a dog.

When I am asked to “join a conversation” by someone who really wants me to listen to their rambling speech.

When I am told my life is “a journey”.

When the literary reviewer tells me how society “consumes” books.

When someone speaks of an “artist” and means a pop singer.

When someone says he is going to a concert and means “a rock festival.”

When I come across the second infinitive in a row.

When someone says a piece of music is a “classic” and means it comes from the 1990s.

When a newspaper reporter tries to explain an event’s significance by calling it “a narrative”.

Whenever someone says something “references” something else, when they fail to distinguish between “mentioning”, “pointing to,” “alluding to” or “quoting from.”

When people tell me that a picture is “graphic” and they may or may not mean it is “unedited” or “vivid” or “shocking.” 

When self-appointed psychologists explain away behaviours by saying someone “unconsciously thought”.

When they ask “what is your philosophy?” and mean “what is your opinion?”

When you read three paragraphs into a new article and still don’t know where or when an event happened.

When certain folks introduce themselves by saying they are “scientists”: when they really are only mid-level technicians.

When those who have never read anything by Darwin bark out that they are opposed to evolution.

When someone speaks of “the best song ever”: and means what they like and have never heard anything composed before 1985.

When politicians claim they are speaking the truth.

When supposedly intelligent people cannot think of anything to compare events with except sports and popular television programmes.

When the word “icon” is replaced by “legend” (not even “legendary”), as though that were a better term.

When little cowardly worms turn the concept of “war”, especially Just War, into a crime against humanity.

When a preacher says that Jesus was a brown-skinned Palestinian.

When someone places a comma after “But” at the start of a sentence.

When someone refers” to “Christianity” but means only Fundamentalist Protestantism.

When someone refers to “religion” and means only Christianity.

When someone writes “everybody” and only means everyone he has spoken to that day.

When a real estate agent puts “a home” up for sale but really refers to a “house”.

When somebody over the age of twenty exclaims: “Cool”.